A Love Letter To Yourself
Writing has been a tool I’ve used for most of my life to express how I feel. An avid diary and journal keeper since childhood, I can’t imagine life without writing about my feelings, hopes and heartache through humor and story. I’ve used my journal to write about anything from my morning coffee, constipation, hopeless dates, fear, letters to food I’ve overeaten, lists of reasons I love people in my life and the things I’m most afraid of.
I know you might be thinking “I’m not a writer, why would I write or keep a journal?” And my answer would be that we can all write because we all experience life and carry stories inside of us. These stories do not have to be shared or detailed like a writer in the form of a poem, novel or a short story but it is our work to release what’s inside of us; for better or worse. When we hold onto our thoughts and experiences they can feel heavy, manifesting as mental weight (think depression or anxiety) or physical weight (think heaviness, varying food choices, drinking excessively).
Writing can be healing, reflective, fun and quirky. It gives space to imagine, play and think. One of my favorite things to do at least once a year, if not more, is write a letter to myself. So, during this month of love, longing and what may be feelings of glory or feelings of wanting to punch the air and scream at love, I encourage you to write a love letter to yourself. A letter of truth and honesty. It’s not an easy exercise, but an effective one in self-reflection. The letter can take on any tone or style that you want. It can be written as a stream of consciousness without any cares of structure, stopping or punctuation; or it can be more formally written. Whatever you do it’s up to you. But I want you to think about love, joy, hurt and the range of emotions and experiences you’ve been having most recently and convert it into a message you reflect back to yourself in love and positivity. A gift.
Below are some questions you might think about as you write. They touch on the present, past and future with a focus on feeling. Yes, this is a feeling exercise. Get yourself in a positive mindset by listening to this video of affirmations. Often times we can arrive in unexpected places when we set the tone to be present, still and feel our way into ourselves. Be inspired.
How do you feel?
What’s something you love to do?
What are you most grateful for?
Who are some people that are most important in your life?
How are you actually treating yourself? Be honest?
What are some promises you’d like to make to yourself?
What are you practicing to love yourself more?
How do you feel about love?
How do you define self-love?
What’s a non-physical trait you love about yourself? Why?
Who and what can you let go of?
Who and what do you want to let into your life?
What are you most proud of? Recount achievements, successes and what YOU are proud of. These will look different for everyone and may or may not include the societal norms of children, marriage, a home - but travel, independence, freedom. Think about it.
What do you want to tell or how will you encourage your future self?
How do you want to feel every day?
What will you start doing to walk toward that feeling?
So, how did it go? How did it feel to write the letter?
The final step is putting it in the mail and addressing it to yourself. This may have been difficult to do and be honest about, but reflecting is beautifully painful. And what you write mirrors back to you that which you love, want or would like to change and that’s ok. We’re all a work in progress. Send the letter to yourself and keep growing in love toward yourself.